FELDKAMP: We must do better to eliminate meanness culture on social media

Dec 11, 2023

President Joe Biden points to sandbags after falling on stage June 1 during the 2023 United States Air Force Academy graduation ceremony in Falcon Stadium, at the United States Air Force Academy in Colorado Springs, Colo. (AP Photo/Andrew Harnik)

It’s been a summer of social media meanness of a certain kind: poking fun at two of our most senior members of government.

President Joe Biden stumbled June 1 while handing out diplomas during the U.S. Air Force Academy commencement ceremony. It wasn’t his first time stumbling.

Then, on Wednesday, July 26, U.S. Sen. Mitch McConnell seemingly froze at the podium for about 28 seconds. This comes after the senator also has fallen several times. He even suffered a concussion due to one of these falls.

Memes, reels and TikToks have mined these misfortunes for laughs. From suggesting that Biden requires adult diapers to calling McConnell “Glitch McConnell,” these social media plays are supposed to be funny. All I see is the same old bully that hounded me in middle school.

I wore a hearing aid and spoke with a lisp. I also had severe plaque psoriasis. There was one boy in particular who liked to make me cry. I remember standing in the hallway with my homeroom teacher. Through tears I asked her, “Why can’t he make fun of me for something I can control?”

This is what I think of when I see the mean-spirited jabs on social media. To these people I ask the same thing: Why can’t you poke at something within their control?

Scrutinize what matters, like their contribution to American politics and public policy. There is plenty to mine there.

If your point is that these men are too old to still be relevant in American politics, then advocate for term limits and age limits for public office.

I am extremely uncomfortable with bullying medical frailties or laughing at the elderly for being simply that: medically fragile or elderly. Regardless of whether or not you disagree with either of their politics, they are still fellow human beings.

Americans have somehow allowed divisive politics to mean that it’s OK to reduce those we disagree with to caricature villains. We think we can treat the opposition as less than human. But isn’t that what former President Donald Trump did and still does?

Weren’t we horrified when Trump mocked a disabled reporter, regularly reduced women to 1-10 rankings and disparaged marginalized people? We can’t have it both ways. We can’t only be horrified when it’s Trump’s behavior. We have to take responsibility for our own.

We all deserve dignity. We all deserve basic kindness. Your behavior — no matter how reprehensible — does not dictate my own. I choose to behave in a way that aligns with my value set regardless of yours. Period. There’s no pass given for meanness because I don’t like you or because I don’t agree with you.

I no longer speak with a lisp. If anything positive came from my bullying, it’s that I doubled down on speech therapy and I doubled down on kindness and compassion. I hope you’ll join me in this conviction and focus our collective energy in better places and in service to the good work that still needs to be done.

Creators Syndicate

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